Ethiopia Mommy

This is an old photo of M, taken about 18 months ago in Ethiopia in the orphanage. She'd been there about 8 months. I think that her birthmom visited her while she was there.

Recently, Melat has been talking about her "blue" mommy and daddy, and thinks that the man who lives in the condo behind us is her "blue daddy" she's just learning her colors in English, so we know this means her brown/Ethiopian dad.

I've not been sure how to respond to her or how to reassure her that they're still there, but she's with us for now. I Wasn't sure how to get her to stop thinking all brown people are her parents, or to stop being afraid each time we're around Ethiopian people that they'll be taking her back to Ethiopia, away from her family here.

She knows that in Ethiopia she had "brown parents." Her mom is still alive there, and while we tried to meet several times in Ethiopia, we sadly were never able to meet one another, which breaks my heart.

Yesterday, I recieved a phone call from our adoption agency's coordinator saying "good news!" She was calling to let me know that she'd recieved some photos of M's birth-mom, and would we like them? OF COURSE!!!

This dear woman who gave her only daughter to us--for reasons that we believe to be M's needing more advanced medical treatment here in the USA for her HIV.

I'm not posting mom's photo here, because I don't want to sacrifice her privacy, but I was stunned. She looks just like I imagine M will at about 16 or 17 years old, only perhaps, skinnier. With M's little "buddah belly" and appetite, it's hard to imagine her ever being so tiny as her mother in Ethiopia.

She's lovely, and shares the same beautiful hair texture (though it was all braided), and even has the same droopy left eyelid! She has a slightly darker complexion. One could easily pick her out of a crowd as M's mom, especially when side-by-side with the photo above.

I don't know why she decided to come in for her photo to be taken with our agency's rep in Ethiopia. Perhaps she's recieved the care package of photos and artwork?

I've started scanning photos and artwork from M and putting them into Shutterfly albums to send to Ethiopia.

I do hope that some day both Melat and I will be able to meet her. I want to hug her and to thank her and to assure her that we're not judging her choice, and that we're caring for her daughter as she would want us to.

I'm working on a letter to send with our next care package and hoping to have a friend translate it for us. Now, if I can just put words to what I want to say. Sometimes I think, words just aren't good enough, which is why last time I wimped out and sent only photos.